When Family Doesn’t Understand…

Jesus and his family

In my readings today, I read Luke 8:19 – It talks about when Jesus was ministering and then his mother and his younger brothers come to him and he basically is like, “Uh Dude, who are my mother and brothers? YOU are my mother and brothers when you hear and do the WORD (Remembering that HE is the Word made flesh that dwells among us John 1:1 – 4).

WHAT! Are you kidding me? I mean I’m not the Son of the Living God or anything but …my parents would have put a hurtin’ on my butt. Right?

WHY Jesus why? We know from the scriptures that His momma loved Him and followed Him to the very end. We know that she was there on the day of Pentecost. We know that James, his younger brother, became the head of the church at Jerusalem (do the research).


jesus and mary from the passion

Passion of the Christ © Icon Productions
Mary and Jesus in a joyful mother-son moment.


Well, here is some interesting insight that I gleaned from my tools eSpirit. From the “Robertson Word Pictures of the New Testament” tells us that Jesus had just been accused of being in cahoots with Beelzebub by the religious leaders the Pharisees. (1) Could it be that they were coming to take Jesus back home to try and protect Him from sudden change of at attitude from the religious leadership.

I can totally and completely relate to this. In my times of rebellion, I cannot tell you how many family meetings or interventions that were called. How many times my family, thinking they were helping “corral” me into a sober life, or a better way, came together with love and honest hearts to try and do ANYTHING to help me.

Now Jesus was a trail blazer and not troubled like I was. But I get it. When family comes to the end of the things that they’ve dealt with or what they understand, they

family intervention group

The proverbial family intervention

try to step in and bully or force you into what they think is right.  With a distraught Mary, worrying about her oldest son, with whom she has witnessed the Hand of the Father move, witnessed the wisdom of the Holy Spirit when Jesus was just a boy, witnessed untold mind-blowing events through his life, seen the miraculous at the wedding of Cana–NOW she feels that it’s up to her to step in and protect Him: she must rally the troops, mobilize the family, and do a snatch and grab and get Jee back to the homestead to regroup.


I can identify with her and I love and respect her. Because no matter who your kid is and what they do, don’t mess wit the mamma! Am I right? So what He’s the King of Kings and Lord of Lords- That’s Her baby that she labored to bring into this world. The one whose boo boos she kissed. Her first born boy!

But Jesus has to put His foot down and say, “My mother and my brethren are these which hear the word of God, and do it.”(KJV).

Maybe a foot as gentle as a brick to the head, but He gets His point across. We don’t hear anything else about it. She’s with Him at the end. He entrusts her care to John the youngest disciple not His other brothers. But that’s a sermon for another day….back to the point.

So, what is the moral of this story you might ask?  Well, here’s what hit me. Even Jesus, the hope of mankind, had a family that thought they knew what was best for Him, thought He might be crazy, thought he

God of heaven and earth


might need some family interventions, took matters into their own hands because the God of the angel armies was JUST NOT BIG ENOUGH TO HANDLE IT, and so on and so on and so on.


Have you ever felt like the people that know you best have absolutely no clue as to what you are called to do? What God is perfecting in you or what your mission on this earth is- etc.? Sometimes it be like that homie. Sometimes it be like that. If Jesus had it, we’re going to have it and more.

The coolest part of it is you have 2/3 of the Godhead praying for you, Jesus has already walked it out when He was here, the Holy Spirit is the best partner, encourager, director, planner, cheerleader, and what other thing you can add in. When you are at your lowest and even your family is looking at you and they’ve called the men in the white coats, the Lord Himself wraps you in His arms and confirms the plans that He has had for you since the foundations of THIS WORLD! His plans are good continuously, plans to give you a future and hope.

I don’t think a future and a hope includes being locked in the psych ward watching the color yellow play ping pong with a polar bear (sometimes the medication is just that good). His plans are good plans, worth fighting the good fight of faith to obtain. Yes, everyone might think you are ding a ling crazy, but all of the best people are.

Look at poor Ezekiel…not me dude! Not me! You wanna go thru Joe’s experience and have your own brothers hate you so much that the sell you buns into slavery rather than deal with you on a day to day! That takes crazy to a whole new level.

And Jesus! The man HIMSELF! Tax collectors, prostitutes, lepers, oh my! AND the religious leaders of the day. That’s like all the popular mega church pastors, televangelists, etc. all rolled up with all the pedophiles that have been in the news, the politicians everyone hates, the elite, our favorite reality gal pals and everyone else all sitting together at Chuck E Cheese with Jesus! You wanna talk about crazy tension.

And…..In walks Jesus’ mom and brothers to try and get Him home out of harm’s way!

Get the picture!

What did Alice say, “Why, sometimes I’ve believed as many as six impossible things before breakfast.” (2) I love this girl because this is how I feel EVERY. SINGLE. MINUTE. OF. EVERY. SINGLE. DAY. Jesus said, “greater works!” I want to do it for Him. To bring glory to Him! So, people can see Him! To expand HIS kingdom.

Hey, if you are anything like me, your family already thinks your cray, why let them down! LOL! Roll with it!  If you have to be like Dave after Ziklag. His men wanted to kill him. Possessions – gone! Wife and kids- Gone! Everything – Gone! (I Samuel 30) Did he cry…He probably wanted to. But he’s a guy so no! He went and ENCOURAGED HIS OWN SELF IN THE LORD!… For I will LOOK to the Hills from wence comes my help! My Help Comes from THE LORD!

Until next time my passionistas! Enjoy every minute of every day!






1/2 way to our goal

We are so close to the goal with more than 50% collected. I want to thank my sisters from TCHS class of’81, All that Glitters, and all those who have sacrificed to give to us.


My mom and grandbabe



Our update is this: We’ve secured the apartment, paid the deposit and 1st months rent, and made arrangements for BGE. We still have some other things that we need. We are taking most of the furniture from Nan’s house. More on that on Monday.

I am asking that you share this where you feel comfortable sharing. I thank God for everyone one of you! It is because of you that we have a place to go. Here is the link if you would like to help. Like I said, we are half way to the goal of $1500. Any and all donation are much appreciated and needed Thanks.

Go Fund Me!

Be Blessed and know that GREAT THINGS are coming in 2017



I remember Momma.

My mom passed on November 16th, 2016. Just 35 days before her 82nd birthday. We’ve been back from Texas for about 2 years, living with her, helping to take care of her, etc.  She steadily grew worse over the last 10-11 months. Recently before she passed, we found out that in this time frame she had experienced two mini strokes and a mild heart attack.


Nan and Leah

This was her with her great-grand baby a little under 6 years ago. She was a vibrant lady. I remember her going out bowling, to dances and everywhere. We took ceramic classes together when I was a ‘tweener. She raised my oldest daughter when I was lost and adrift on a sea of zombie induced heroin addiction.


This is my oldest daughter, Jenn.

She prayed and cried! She packed bags of food and would ride up into Baltimore City with her girlfriend “Marge” to drop off money or food. She would pray and pray and she was able to finally rest every time she accepted the collect call from the jail. She knew I was safe and off the streets! She knew I had enough to eat, had a shower, soap, clean clothes, toothbrush and paste and the glorious 3 hots and a cot.  Then, she could finally sleep through the night.

So would hope against hope that I would get myself together. And eventually I did. Thank God I was done with all that 15 years ago. Toward the end, when the dementia set in, she would call me Juanita. That was her brother, Bud’s wife. Juanita has been gone for a long time.  She would say, “I know you are Barbara, but what happened to Juanita”? Often she would ask, “What day is this?” or “Where is Tia?”-


This is her with Tia for her Homecoming in Oct. 2016

she’s my youngest daughter (who is 16).  She always wanted to know where all of my children were.  Oh and even though towards the end of her days, she loved that great grand baby. My oldest daughter, and my brother Lenny and his wife, Jo Ann, well, let’s just say we weren’t her favorites.

She was mean as a snake one minute, and the next minute, she was as happy as a lark.  It was emotionally hard for everyone. I can honestly tell you there were days that I lost my temper! I mean I really lost it. And then I would pray and cry and ask both her and the Lord to forgive me. They always say take the bad with the good, because one day, they’ll be gone.

They were right! I’d love to see her give me the evil stare one more time! One more time, to here her say, “Where’s Juanita?” Or yell or laugh or what ever. I miss her. Alot! We thought we had more time. No one realized that 1 week after they put her on hospice, she would be gone. She was.


my babies all grown up

My brother, his wife and my youngest brother Gene, decided it would be good for me to keep her house. My 16 year old could finish out her education in the High School she was going too. But that was a dream. According to the way she wrote her will, everything was to be sold and split between her 3 children, 3 grandchildren and 1 great grand baby. No way around it. So here I sit writing this 33 days after she had passed packing up her stuff and preparing to celebrate Christmas one last time. Surrounded by all of her stuff for 1 more go round.

I have 15 days to move into an apartment. We did get accepted but we still need funds to be able to pay for the electric deposit, rental deposit and the first months rent. I am asking that you send this link around as we are trying to raise funds on “Gofundme.com”

Here’s the link to the Go fund me page

If you can help, please help. If you can’t, please pray, send good thoughts and remember us as well gather for our first holiday without her. Cherish your family, friends, loved ones! Do it now because you don’t know when will be your last time with them. Give them an “I love you” every time you walk out, say good bye over the phone or text!!

Until next time,

Be a Passion Junkie by loving those around you and allowing them to love you.



This is THE passion junkie–ME!



He laughs and scatters

Psalms 68-

“Our Father scatters His enemies. Even those that think about trying to rise up against Him, He laughs. Their hope of defeating Him was a lost cause-even before they begin to think about it.”

When I read this and studied it out, I realized what an awesome reminder of God’s protection is towards us! Our DAD literally breaks in pieces and scatters His enemies. (Ps 68:1).





A primitive root; to dash in pieces, literally or figuratively (especially to disperse): – break (dash, shake) in (to) pieces, cast (abroad), disperse (selves), drive, retire, scatter (abroad), spread abroad.”

Satan has deceived every one of his followers into thinking that they stand a chance of winning this thing! But as we read the scriptures we see over and over that they never stood a chance. Can you see how the enemy’s thinking is flawed? If he was able to win the battle or even the war, he would have done it before he was cast down from his position of the anointed cherub that covers (Ezekiel 28:14).

 Father states over and over that they are nothing before Him! One of my verses states that HE LAUGHS AT HIS ENEMIES BECAUSE HE KNOWS THEIR END. (Ps 37:12-15) jesus laughsAs a matter of fact, let’s just look at that scripture.

“Psalms 37:12-15

12-The wicked plots against the righteous
And gnashes at him with his teeth.
13 –The Lord laughs at him [the wicked one—the one who oppresses the righteous],
For He sees that his day [of defeat] is coming.
14 –The wicked have drawn the sword and bent their bow
To cast down the afflicted and the needy,
To slaughter those who are upright in conduct [those with personal integrity and godly character].
15 –The sword [of the ungodly] will enter their own heart,
                   And their bow will be broken.

David goes on to say that as smoke is driven away -drive them (your enemies Of God) away. Like wax melts in a fire…melt them (the wicked=raw-shaw’)

From H7561; morally wrong; concretely an (actively) bad person: – + condemned, guilty, ungodly, wicked (man), that did wrong.)

 I mean how powerful is this illustration Wax in our hand is ours to deal with. If I put a candle in the bonfire, the candle can do NOTHING to stop itself from melting…Dave is saying the wicked have absolutely no recourse against an All Powerful God.

So here’s the question…Why are we being intimidated by an enemy whose end is already decided? Why are we operating in a paralyzing fear that he can take us out?

Let’s be perfectly honest with each other. Let’s be real! If someone messes with my kid on every level, they have to deal with me! I’m not saying that                      momma bear and cubI’m bad to the bone and that people tremble when I walk in a room!

I AM saying, I will but myself in harm’s way to protect my kids and grand kids. For that matter, I WOULD PUT MYSELF IN HARMS WAY FOR ANYONE THAT I LOVE!!!! That includes family and friends.

As I mentioned in a previous post-Don’t mess with momma bear!

I am comforted when I read these scriptures! It reassures me on a deep personal level that The God of the universe protects   His babies, His kids.

And I love the Dave explores these confidences in the Psalms. He understood how much he was loved. When his family left him out in the field when the prophet came to dinner, God saw him. He spoke with David and revealed Himself and His awesomeness out there on the back side of some field. In the night and in the day, the Lord was his protector.

That is why Dave stepped out on that field to face Goliath. David was outraged that abomination of nature would even DARE to speak about His Father God! And that confidence in the Almighty is what I want to display every single day of my life!

As funky as our world is today, we REALLY need to know that God is for us and not against us! He is our front guard and our rear guard. His angels camp round about us, so we don’t even stub our toe…WHAT!???

YEAH! It says that. The. Almighty. Cares. For. You!

We can’t change that. We can refuse to walk in it or to try and understand it, but we can’t change it.

Be encouraged! His word NEVER returns to Him without producing results.

What do you think? Can you buy into these truths and principles?

Share a comment.

Warriors war; that’s what we do

Some people say your  “the momma bear”. Others call is the lioness protecting her cubs. I call it Jesus’ warrior bride covering those people she loves and calls her family. For that matter, this warrior bride can war at the drop of a hat.  Blessed be the Lord God who has taught my hands to war and my fingers to fight.  I love that verse. It’s who I AM-not what I do. I war.

I could be at work and be overtaken with the urge to pray. I’mma pray for a minute then get back to work. I would see something on line that breaks my heart. I excuse myself from my family for a minute and go into my prayer closet and pray until the burden is listed. I will raise up that hedge so that the serpent can slide on in and bite.

prayer and tears

The more I study prayer and deliverance, the more I pray and I am delivered! Russ Dizdar has awesome free mp3’s on his website Shatterthedarkness.com and they are awe sooooommmme. I’ve never felt so alive and engaged in shredding beyond recognition the enemies’ camps.

Remember that time the devil won???!!?!?!?!

Yeah, ME EITHER….It’s because he is ALREADY DEFEATED. JESUS conquered him at Calvary!!!! The cross of Christ stomped death, hell AND THE GRAVE.

the risen Christ

 Come on what are we so afraid of!!!!???? It’s time to engage people of the Living God. He is the GOD OF THE ANGEL ARMIES. And here is one of my favorites


People we’ve already won. Jesus paid the price, he did the hard part! All we really need to do is occupy the kingdom and hold it until He comes back. Jesus didn’t say it was gonna be biscuits’ covered with gravy every single day of your life. He said because they hate me (and Father God), they going to hate you! He also said be of good cheer, I have overcome the world (the world system).

Please stop crying bout your past and put your big girl panties on –lace up those boot straps, grab a weapon and stand your post.  No one was ever won for Jesus by a whinny snivelly defeated Christian.

What was that song? They will know we are Christians by our love by our love. Remember that one.

This is how I started the morning.  Psalms 68:1-4

Psa 68:1  To the chief Musician, A Psalm or Song of David. Let God arise, let his enemies be scattered: let them also that hate him flee before him.

Psa 68:2  As smoke is driven away, so drive them away: as wax melteth before the fire, so let the wicked perish at the presence of God.

Psa 68:3  But let the righteous be glad; let them rejoice before God: yea, let them exceedingly rejoice.

Psa 68:4  Sing unto God, sing praises to his name: extol him that rideth upon the heavens by his name JAH, and rejoice before him. (KJV)


Lets try the amplified –


The God of Sinai and of the Sanctuary

To the Chief Musician. A Psalm of David. A Song.

68 Let God arise, and His enemies be scattered;
Let those who hate Him flee before Him.

As smoke is driven away, so drive them away;
As wax melts before the fire,
So let the wicked and guilty perish before [the presence of] God.

But let the righteous be glad; let them be in good spirits before God,
Yes, let them rejoice with delight.

Sing to God, sing praises to His name;
Lift up a song for Him who rides through the desert—
His name is the Lord—be in good spirits before Him.

Does this sound like a Being that is gonna bow down to someone else?

Of course not. He knows the endgame from the beginning. And people, let me tell you–WE WIN!

Saddle up partners! We have to live life on life’s terms. BUT WE HAVE A GOD WHO WINS.–therefore, we win!

Until next time-Yippy Ki AYE!





How does 1 go from …

Ezekiel 28:15-117

15 “You were blameless in your ways From the day you were created


 lucifer_by_valerhon-d3abfa3 (2)



15 b–Until unrighteousness was found in you. 16“By the abundance of your trade You were internally filled with violence, And you sinned; Therefore I have cast you as profane From the mountain of God. And I have destroyed you, O covering cherub, From the midst of the stones of fire. 17“Your heart was lifted up because of your beauty; You corrupted your wisdom by reason of your splendor. I cast you to the ground; I put you before kings, That they may see you.


Isaiah 14
12   How art thou fallen from heaven, O Lucifer, son of the morning! how art thou cut down to the ground, which didst weaken the nations!
13   For thou hast said in thine heart, I will ascend into heaven, I will exalt my throne above the stars of God: I will sit also upon the mount of the congregation, in the sides of the north:
14   I will ascend above the heights of the clouds; I will be like the most High.
15   Yet thou shalt be brought down to hell, to the sides of the pit.

God still sits on His Throne

Abba still sits on His Throne…! We win! I read the back of the book.

However! When will we truly come before Him, Humbled and with a contrite heart? Lucifer fell because of his pride. He thought he knew more that God. He was wrong

It may look hopeless in our country right now but…

Remember this one:

“If my people, who are called by my name, shall humble themselves, and pray, and seek my face, and turn from their wicked ways; then will I hear from heaven, and will forgive their sin, and will heal their land.

Where is our turning back to the God that saves us from our own folly?  If we will wake up as a Nation or as His Bride and cry out, will HE NOT ANSWER us?  Are we still plugged in to the hypnotic rhythm of today’s music, culture or media?

I’ve turned off the T V for 2 weeks now and what a difference. I can think better, reason better, pay more attention to what is happening around me in my job and city.

I feel like screaming from the top of my lungs, NEO I took the RED PILL!!  (enjoy that link)

 Wake Up O Sleeper! Stop trying to be politically correct! We are way way beyond that. Sin is Sin and it has always been so. Why are we so worried about being liked!?  Jesus said, “You’re going to be persecuted! You’re going to have trouble…But be of good cheer, for I have overcome the world..Barbara’s paraphrase…We better wake up before the judgement comes. We better stop waiting for God to rescue us because my Field Guide to the Super Nature (The Word) tells me that he is coming back to a Bride without spot and wrinkle. A Church that will stop singing Kum Ba Yah and get up off it’s laurels and relevant to this generation. If people weren’t spiritually starving to death, there would NOT be a revival of the occult, vampirism, shape shifters, witches and other television programs.


This is not sloppy agape and greazy grace offered by the prideful lucifer. Grace causes us to want more of the Lord not the “see what I can get by with today” (this is the counterfeit created in the prideful heart of Lucifer.

from famine to Feast

Wow! I’ve always said that life can change in a blink of an eye. Well, that has happened for us!

We’ve gone from moving from Baltimore, Maryland to Montgomery, Texas. We’ve settled in and are really beginning to enjoy all that Texas has to offer. My daughter has settled into the 7th grade and is doing exceptionally well; good grades, caring friends and an awesome youth group.  I have gone from resting and revitalizing to eating from the fruit of the land.  Job offers, new business opportunities and another venture in helping people keep their homes. All this and school part time~~ the passionista is busy busy busy.

Also working on the ministry website for Lucaslevin.org…Great music, great words and excellent teachings make this prophetic voice one of a kind. Stop by the blog or like him on facebook.

karis logo

If I must be truthful, I flourish and shine during the busy times. I think that I get bored and lazy when things are too quiet. When my proverbial back is against the wall, I rise to the top!  Something very strange but also very true. Some of us thrive being in the pressure cooker. I love it there. Am I an adrenaline junkie? I don’t know.  But the proof is in the pudding or so they say.

Just wanted to drop a line…it’s been so long. East coast people, I am very envious of the snow…so here are some pictures of who I am an where I want to be.

dancing in the snow           snow in central park